Hey, psst...big news over here. There has been a dangling tooth situation over here for a few weeks. My mom couldn't take it anymore, gave my sister a paper towel and instructed her to take care of that disgusting dangling tooth situation.
Someone is losing a tooth today. And it isn't me. I need my front tooth to continue my thumb sucking habit.
Oh my gosh, you don't think they are going to pull MY teeth do you? I need them to chase tennis balls and decapitate small woodland animals.
Neither toddler nor hound were abused while minor home bound dentistry was performed, make a note.
But, damn that's one heck of a crater don't you think? Extraction of that one tooth entertained the whole family for hours this weekend.
I wanted to get busy with the three others that are loose but had my family orthodontia license abruptly revoked by the 7 year old.
Her first question was. "If I lose the other one soon will you cut the corn off the cob for me this summer?"
I know I'm a little gruesomely extraction happy but even I could answer a sweetly positioned "Yes, baby" to that one.
Then she tossed her hand on her hip and with tween attitude proclaimed the tooth fairy a fake.
I replied, "Ahh, those that believe in magic receive magic in the form of $1.00 bills." "Make it two and I'll be good all day, she bargained." "Hey, make it one, a pack of gum AND you keep the secret zipped up tight around your sister, comprende?" "Fine, she skipped off, wearing a new toothless off kilter grin."
And you know what she did on Monday? When the class asked what the tooth fairy brought over the weekend she told a tale of fakes. Yes, I am the parent of THAT child in the first grade class. I'm shocked I didn't receive hate mail.
I know I've said it before but I'll say it again. May she grow big and strong to use her powers for good and not evil.