Saturday, August 09, 2008

As We Walked The Pork Tent

In my town there are two types of people, people who are state fair snobs and absolutely refuse to attend each and every August even though the state fair serves up big yummy fried stuff and meat on a stick. Perhaps that's part of the reason they are state fair snobs to begin with. And then, there are your state fair enthusiasts. I personally haven't met anyone in the middle politically when speaking of the state fair in mixed company. You love it or hate it, it's a Hilary thing.

I used to be a state fair snob. I went once in the early 1990's and suffered my way through the entire day. It was hot, lots and lots of sweaty people, not one vegetable within ear shot and did I mention the lots and lots of sweaty people...some without teeth. So, for the next 10 years I was a proud and unrepentant state fair snob, wouldn't touch the place.

Then I starting taking up with a couple of little neo-fair'ites on a regular basis. I have repented and seen the light. The light of a fried twinkie, light enough to brighten up even the darkest hour has changed my once dreary and cold heart forever.

Yesterday was it, state fair day. We went with our friends...who are quite frankly, hardcore. Arrive early, leave late and munch munch munch along the way. I am not afraid to tell you I walked a mile and a half after being at the fair for 8 hours just to get the best damn cheese popcorn this state makes. It was that kind of day.

It was a food tour-de-force to make Emeril and Paula blush. This is how good Livi's first snack of corn dog was. This was especially meaningful to the group since it contained BOTH something fried AND meat on a stick.

If that is not worth $4.50, I don't know what is. Mmmmm...good.

The kids ate their corn dogs and fries while I was scolded for choosing that plate of fries for the children to share. My friend explained..."Fries? no no, you can get those any old day, you must get something more exotic it's our day at the fair." Oh, I nodded in sophomoric agreement as ketchup dribbled onto my tee shirt. My friend added a paper basket of fried green tomatoes to the table for emphasis. Oh, and they were heavenly.

On our way over to the rides I stopped for a lemon shake up. In another good hearted but lame move on my part I decided to share with my kids and my friend's daughter. Needless to say I should have upped the order to the 32oz. lemon shake up...I got exactly 4 sips for myself.

Meanwhile, we arrive at the carnival rides section of the fair and my friend announces we need the family pack of at least 25 tickets. (In past years, I have NEVER conceded to let my children ride the rides.) Hey, they are operating on a horses stomach over at the equine barn, who needs rides? All of us rode the ferris wheel and not one of us saw a seat belt! And we lived to tell about it.

After Ava rode the log water ride all by herself my friend started to speak quietly and leaned into me as if she wanted to share a secret. I tilted my head as she announced, "I have a secret. I have been in the closet for years but I LOVE the games. Want to win the kids a stuffed animal?" I replied, "What are you crazy, pay $20.00 for a stupid cheap stuffed dog? " Stop, you must know what happened next.

My little Ava soaked that water balloon with the gun faster than anyone else, beating my friend two times in a row...she and her little friend walked out of there with matching pugs.

After all the stuffed animal winning drama I started to loosen up a bit. How could one not be happy surrounded by so many corn dogs?

This corn dog tent won most original dressing up of corn dogs 2008. Blue ribbon corn dog presentation if you will.

Here is my friend L and her daughter E. Pay close attention to the corn dog second from the left. Don't worry, I don't think Mr. Corn Dog inhales.

After, more fun with corn dogs I promptly purchased a fully loaded cheesy chicken quesidilla. It was all of 20 minutes before I was running to the nearest, ummm, ladies room.

To cheer myself up...a trip to the snow cone kiosk. What else could I do?

But then the same thing happened to the sno cone that happened to my lemon shake up. Why does Liv still weigh 27 lbs but my pants are tight? Interesting phenomenon that should be studied next year in the bovine tent.

After all this merriment we stumbled on the outdoor circus, and saw an elephant walk on a ball. That site was beaten in shock and awe value when we saw a 63 year old woman in spandex "Vogue" as her 5 Afgan dogs jumped six feet bars. The quesidilla was rumbling again, it had to have been the spandex sighting. I looked at my watch and we had been at the fair no shorter than 7 1/2 hours at that point.

It was then that my friend announced she would be walking 1 1/2 miles to the farthest popcorn tent there was in the central state area before getting in the car to go home. Was I in? At that point, how could I say no to yet more adventure. Off we went, working our little pork filled legs to the cheesy popcorn tent.

Today, I'm a little sad there is no champion grey rabbit to pet or 1200 lb. World's Largest Pig to snicker at. Oh well , there's always next year to get the fried bananas foster cheescake.


Johnny said...

Unknown meat on a stick?

No seatbelts?

You're in China baby!

Elaine said...

Recently someone asked my older daughter what she missed most about the US. She said, "I think the rides at the fair and the corn dogs".
So there you have it.
And yep, we have lots of unknown meat on a stick here, but no corndogs. And, of course, no seatbelts.